A day in the life...

...of Joseph Sweet.

AT 5am I start making noises in my sleep so that mummy knows I'm about to wake up. I think it's only fair to give her a little warning because if she's not quick enough in picking me up then I'm going to scream the house down.
5.30am, bum changed, bottle of milk in mouth and snuggled up with mummy on the settee, I just might go back to sleep for a little while....yawn!
7am and I wake up to my big sisters watching tv, yeah! time to play. Mummy tries to ply me with food but I don't want to eat, I want to play..now where is the tv remote, I love it when Lucy squeels because I've turned over...he he he
8am, ok bored now, mummy is only interested in Lucy and Leila and making them get dressed in the same clothes, uniform she calls it. I know she's already washed and dressed me and give me lots of fuss, but I don't want her to do the same for them, they are big, they can look after themselves, my mummy, my mummy. Ok I'm going to whine now.
8.30am and I'm in my puschair in the garden. Mummy got a bit fed up of my moaning and told me to wait out here until she's ready. Ok, but only for 5 minutes. Hey, look at that cat, what's she up to now.
MUMMY, MUMMY, MUMMY,  I'm bored out here.
8.40am and we're on our way to school. I love going out, wish  could run like Lucy and Leila, but it's fun watching. I love watching all the other children at the school. This is so much fun, I could do this all day.
9.15am, back home. I'm tired but mummy wants to do some cleaning up first so I follow the vaccuum cleaner around and help out when I can. I like to clean up the cat food, but mummy isn't happy when I throw it all over the kitchen floor. How am I supposed to clean it up if it's not in a mess? Mummy give me a brush thing and a plastic tray and tells me to clean up. I'm good at this, I know the brush thing pushes the cat food all around and it's great fun. Not quite sure what the tray is for, but this keeps me happy for ages and ages and ages.
MUMMY, MUMMY, MUMMY, I'm tired.
9.30am, bum changed and time for milk. Maybe, I'll take a little nap now.
11.30am, ooooh that feels good, now where is my mummy?
Lot's of cuddles off mummy and some stories and play time, this is the life. If only she would give me this attention all day long.
12.30pm, lunch time. If it's not my favourite eggy bread I'm not eating it. Ok, maybe I'll eat a sausage, but don't you dare try and get me to eat a sandwich or toast. Nice cup of juice too, yum.
After lunch we go out, mostly shopping, sometimes the library, we might even go on a bus. I quite like the bus, but only when it's moving, I will sing and dance then. I don't like the bus when it stops, that's time for moaning, come on bus get a move on.
Back in the house and I'm bored. No mummy, I don't want that toy, I don't want a story, I'm not hungry, I'm not tired, I don't want cuddles, I don't want songs, I don't want tv. Mummy says "what do you want?" but I just want to moan and cry. I don't know why, I just do. It makes mummy sad, but I can't help that. Mummy says we can't stay out all day we have to be home sometimes, but I just want my pushchair.
I know, I'll practice some screaming, I'm getting really good at that. I'm not so sure that it's good that mummy is pulling out her hair. It's not my fault mummy, I just can't help myself.
3pm back in the pushchair in the garden. Come on mummy, want to go now. Mummy's swigging quickly from a big cup, like she hasn't had a drink all day. Want to go now MUMMY! Mummy says wait, we are too early to go yet.
3.15pm and we are off to school again to pick up Lucy and Leila. All the mummys say how lovely I am, and what a good boy I am. My mummy just smiles and looks tired and sad.
3.40pm and we are home again. It's good to have my sisters back but they don't play with me for long. I want to play with Daddy but he's playing with Lucy. I decide to help mummy with the washing. Look mummy I emptied it all over the floor.
Oh my, Lucy left the bathroom door open, time for some fun.
Ooops, mummy isn't happy, she's scrubbing my hands and telling me it's dirty to play in the toilet. So, what is the toilet for if not for playing in?
4.30pm Mummy is in the kitchen with the door shut. Daddy is looking after me. Ok Daddy, play with me then. DADDY DADDY DADDY.  Daddy doesn't know how to shut me up, Daddy doesn't know what to do with me, Daddy asks mummy why I'm crying all the time. Mummy says "go away I'm cooking"
Daddy decided to take me to see nanny. I like going to see nanny, it's different and I get lots of fuss.
5.30pm When we get home I'm straight into my high chair for more food. I'm so hungry, I'm going to eat it all up, every last bit, well apart from the bits which fall all over the floor. Food has gone, juice has gone. MUMMY MUMMY MUMMY.

Oh no my tummy hurts, oh mummy help me. I lift my legs up and screw up my face, OUCH OUCH OUCH OUCH OUCH. Mummy is holding me, "it's ok sweetie, it'll be ok"
OUCH OUCH OUCH OUCH OUCH.
Mummy has me on the floor now, nappy off and she's stroking my tummy and talking softly. I can't hear, I'm screaming.
OUCH OUCH OUCH OUCH. ARRRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!
Phew, glad that's out. I don't like that at all.
Mummy is holding her nose and calling me stinky. She looks funny.

7pm and I'm in the bath. I love the bath, I love bubble up my nose. I can splash and splash and splash. Mummy says don't drink the water and it tastes nasty, but I still drink it. Mummy washes me which isn't so much fun even though she tries to make me laugh by ticking or singing silly songs. Then it's up into mummys soft, fluffy warm arms for a big snuggle and a gentle rub.
7.30pm I'm in my sleepsuit, drinking my milk. Lucy and Leila are in the bath. I sing along with mummy to Eastenders, then I cuddle up and go to sleep.
10pm I wake up. Mummy give me a cuddle and I go back to sleep.
11.30pm I wake up and I'm thirsty. Mummy gives me a drink and I go back to sleep.
1.30am I wake up thirsty and lonely. Mummy gives me a cuddle. NO MUMMY, I'M THIRSTY TOO. Mummy tells me to be quiet and gets me a drink.
3.30am I wake up thirsty and lonely. Mummy looks tired. Maybe i'll just have a cuddle this time. But I can't get back to sleep. Maybe mummy would like to play? No, mummy doesn't want to play. Ok, I'll go to sleep. If only she would give me a drink. PLEASE MUMMY. Yawn!

AT 5am I start making noises in my sleep.......